Connecting to My Skin


There’s so much vulnerable authenticity waiting to be made manifest in the world around me 


Why don’t we talk about our insecurities more? Instead of openness, I see so many people trying to cover up, wrap around, contain + conceal their insecurities from simply existing and being seen and not just by others - but even finding space for it yourself. 


And this just puts everyone on a never ending hamster wheel of ‘I have to be perfect’, ‘I must never show jealousy, or fear, or self doubt’, ‘I should do it all alone, everyone else is’. 


But they’re not. They’re hiding. Ignoring. Shaming themselves and anyone else to experience anything messier than the squeaky-clean, what’s-profitable-and-pretty ideals we’ve come to uplift as a society. 


Well I’m stopping there. 


I’m uplifting the dirt. 


Here’s a list of things I have felt/feel insecure about: 

my smile

my arms 

my desire for connection 

the scars on my body

the limp in my walk

the speech impediment I can’t hear

my strength 

my tenderness 

my writing abilities 

shit my abilities in general 

the family I grew up with 

the shoes I was wearing 

the way my mouth moves when I talk


I hope in reading this list you come to Know how universal it is to doubt yourself. I hope the next time you feel beneath your power that you recognize the beautiful humanity in those emotions before shaming them beneath the surface. 


Above all else - I hope you experience more vulnerability when meeting the self. 


I hope one day, in your bed, or in a big field, or maybe in a yoga shalla in the Sacred Valley of Peru, you face the shaming of these emotions with a fullness that allows you to once again 


really 


smile. 




-Ani Khēmeia